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Best Site Search Terms - January 2010

One of the things I love best are the weird phrases that people put into search engines that bring them here. Here were my favorites from the first month of 2010.

some asshole talking - If you want to see some asshole talking, just turn on C-SPAN. There's always some asshole talking there. Or Fox News. Or Rush Limbaugh.

herb butter like the little mermaid - Hmmm. Are you looking for herb butter shaped like the little mermaid - or that tastes like it?

american great breasted pornography - Is all American pornography "great breasted?" Well, I guess at least in this day and age of implants.

cazy things people do in cars - I know one crazy thing - misspelling!

ewok semiotics - Semiotics - the study of signs and symbols. I don't think the Ewoks had many symbols, as they were primitive. Wait, I'm not a Star Wars geek! Wait, I am. I admit it.

i am not mike lewis - You and about 4.5 billion other people (but I think there are about 500 million Mike Lewis-es).

joonh deere porn - God, I hope you were really looking for "John Deere porn." Actually, no I don't. Listen, I don't want to see porn that involves tractors OR antlered animals.

peoplee dance crazy like no one is waching - And peeple spel liek no won is edjukated.

things to put in your pants - What, like stuffing "armadillos in your trousers?" (Yeah, you should know what movie is!)

things to say to make people think their crazy - How about constantly confusing "their" and "they're?"

whorst spam - More like "whorst" spelling!